


The Twelve-Sided Coin

by flawedamythyst



Category: Doctor Who
Genre: Crack, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-24
Updated: 2013-11-24
Packaged: 2018-01-02 13:49:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 707
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1057519
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flawedamythyst/pseuds/flawedamythyst
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Some things are so obvious they don't even need to discuss them. Others require a sense of fair play to decide.</p>
<p>Set towards the end of the 50th Anniversary Episode. Written very quickly and a bit roughly.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Twelve-Sided Coin

The Doctor waited until the youngest of the three TARDISes parked in the gallery had disappeared, and then turned to his younger self with his best smirk.

“So, your place or mine?”

“Sorry?” said the other version of him with a twitch of his head and a raise of his eyebrows.

“Oh, come on,” said The Doctor, raising his hands and clasping them together. “I know what that look means when it’s on my face. Your face. Our face. You’ve been thinking about it as much as I have. All that remains now is to decide if we’re using your place,” he turned to gesture at the other TARDIS, “or mine.” He gave more of a flourish as he indicated his TARDIS. She was the best one, after all.

The sandshoe-wearing Doctor continued to look puzzled for a split-second, “I’m sorry, I don’t-” the expression abruptly wiped off his face. “Yeah, all right, course I’ve been thinking it. Who wouldn’t?”

“Apparently the other guy,” said The Doctor, looking at the empty space where a third TARDIS had just been.

The matchstick-man Doctor made a face. “Yeah, but he’s all old and- you know. Not fun.”

“We’re fun, though,” said The Doctor.

The other Doctor grinned back. “Oh yeah,” he agreed. “You’re wrong, though. There’s more than just location to decide. I mean – who’s going to go first? And in what position?”

Those were very valid questions. “We’ll toss a coin,” decided The Doctor, pulling one out.

The Doctor with the ridiculous hair (what had he been thinking? Had his version of the TARDIS just not had any mirrors or something?) frowned at it. “That’s a twelve-sided Balerian lirat,” he pointed.

“Exactly,” said The Doctor. “Twelve sides, twelve choices.”

“I only count nine,” said the younger Doctor.

The Doctor grinned. “Well, I’m sure we both have equipment that could be used,” he said. “We’ll include whose choice it is on that as well.”

They exchanged mutual grins, and then settled down to make some important decisions.

Two hours later, they were still at it.

“No, no, we said the triple-heads meant that we’d use your TARDIS and equipment, but that I’d make the decision over who starts and in what position.”

“No, that was the unidentifiable amphibious creature. Triple-heads was my TARDIS, your equipment, and me making both the decisions.”

“No, no. Wait, hang on. Let’s start again. Surprisingly realistic rendition of the explosion of Balerian Six was-”

There was a cleared throat and they turned to see the curator at the door. “I’m sorry, gentlemen, but I was wondering how much longer you were intending to be here? I need to lock up.”

“Not long,” said The Doctor. “We’re just making some decisions.”

“Couldn’t you make them elsewhere?” asked the curator, looking pointedly at the TARDISes.

“We’re trying to decide which one we’re going to,” said The Doctor.

“We’re going to play Galifreyan tiddly-winks,” said The Doctor in the pin-striped suit (pin-stripes! Honestly, some people had no taste). “It’s rather a complicated game, can only really be played by Time Lords. We just can’t decide how to start playing.”

“Tiddly-winks,” repeated the curator. “Right, okay. Well, have fun. Just let me know when I can turn the lights out.”

He left again and the Doctors exchanged looks.

“Do you think he bought it?” asked The Doctor.

The other Doctor shrugged. “Does it matter? Come on, toss again. I think I’ve got them all now.”

The Doctor tossed the coin to reveal the side engraved with The Fortress of Jalkedon.

“Oh, I remember that one,” he said. “Your TARDIS, my equipment-”

“-I start, and you decide the position,” finished his other self.

They both sprang to their feet.

“I think we’ll start with you tying me up and getting creative,” said the other Doctor.

The Doctor beamed. “Excellent! I’ll get some handcuffs, and that massive dildo we got from that woman on Hadiss Seven.”

“Oh, I like that one,” said his counterpart with a bit of purr in his voice. The Doctor beamed at him, then sprinted off to his TARDIS. The sooner they did this, the sooner it would be his turn to decide the next position, and he had a whole series of excellent ideas already.


End file.
